So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
You are not answering and I think it is because you spent 80 dollars worth of drinks on you hot cousin.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
His 21st birthday is in the middle of shark week, it's meant to be.
You know being hammered seven days in a row can do serious damage to your liver.
Text me on Monday and make sure I'm still alive
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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