I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
Randomize
