last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Found the puke drawer
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
