Wow that girl who lives a couple houses down is going out wearing butterfly wings a skirt and fishnets
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Shit. She's still hooking up with some random in the doorway. How do I get out of here?
Well hurry! Everybody is already at McDonalds.
I'm free! Didnt realize how easy it was to crawl out the window.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
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