I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
You dont lie about slip and slides
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Randomize
