That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
I have 3 texts in my phone that say "Thanks King Tyler". I think I've successfully drank myself into a monarchy.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
