I want to walk on stilts...naked
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
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