Is it wierd that I kind of wish I could hang out with Melissa Joan Hart?
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Dignity is for republicans.
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
After you finished the $300 bottle of wine you just started crying about how if Mulder and Scully didn't invite you to join the x-files your life would be meaningless because you "love that weird shit"
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
Um, just removed my insulin from the fridge so that I could fit our case in there. Tell me, who has their priorities straight? THIS GIRL.
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize
