we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
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