He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
new years resolution: more sex, less car punching, more chipotle.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
He started screaming "fuck me I'm Ryan Gosling" and proceeded to pick up the smallest guy at the party and carry him to bed.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
It's very disconcerting to wake up and she is gone. I never know where she could be. It's like playing wheres Waldo but Waldo could potentially be drunk and wandering around in weird places that normal Waldo's don't go.
Randomize
