I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
I do believe that seeing camel toe in leopard print pants at Walmart is the closest I will ever come to going on a safari
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Fuck. What bets did I make about "yeah when the Cubs win the World Series" that I gotta reneg on????
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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