I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
When I watch porn and jerk off like 95% of the time Iron Chef is on in the background...
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
