You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
At least in the future when we're all real people we can laugh about the time we all had scabies together?
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
