It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
I'm using toast as a chaser. If I wasn't already so fucked up this would be revolting.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
Yes, you can glue plastic eyes to my dick and take pictures while I'm asleep. If you tell anyone I said you could do that Ima fight you.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
Randomize
