is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I really wish i had a penis so i could dick slap that bitch right now
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize
