just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
It was your ex but it was not eighties night, it was pudding wrestling. And either thank you or I'm sorry depending on the state of my pants left on the doorstep
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Just spent 10 minutes washing away my own puke. This gas station lady loves me.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I accidentally left my shirt at my booty calls house. He washed it & hung it up for me in his closet. I can't decide if that's sweet or creepy
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
