just survived the first fart of the relationship.
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I broke the girls bed. I will not apologize about bragging.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
Unintentional and slightly frustrating adventures are basically all I'm good for. Expect heart palpitations, cheap food, and homeless men serenading us.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
Thanks to that wedding, I got to use the term "finger bang" more than I have since high school.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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