I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Just found the bucket list I wrote when I was high...somehow I dont think "jello swimming pool" is gonna happen.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
I know. I told you I'm a mess. She had weird nipples. I almost lost an eye to one.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
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