The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Happy heartbreak day....you got chocolates, I'm eating them/ throwing them out the window at passing couples
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Question: should I be considering heels or is this the kind of night where I should plan on falling on my face regardless of my choice of footwear?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
Randomize
