it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
soon, soon....
I don't believe you anymore. You're like the boy who cried coitus.....
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
