super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
all we need is a shotglass and a helicopter.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
There's always time for handjobs
Her stepmother interrupted our sex to tell her it was midnight and she wanted to do a sympathy shot for her 50th.
Don't break up.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
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