Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
John stretched a condom over his face and tried to puke in it.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
My only regret is that I have but one penis to give to your vagina.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
If anyone needs me I'll be in the bathtub, eating fast food and shooting straight vodka while I seriously evaluate my life choices and cry.
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Why is this not the first time I’ve seen the mugshot of someone I’ve slept with
Randomize
