I saw a penis in my cereal this morning. do you think my cheerios are like professor trelawney's tea leaves?
one can only hope.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
All I'm saying is the next time I see him naked, there better be something in it for me that doesn't end in bailing him out of jail.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize