I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I'm proud of you for choosing to be an organ donor on your fake!!
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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