me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Randomize