Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
I just used 'come play with my balls' as a legitimate booty call attempt. And it worked.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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