I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
OMG THIS GUYS LICENSE PLATE IS GETTNHRWET
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
Is it love? I honestly haven't even thought about watching porn for over a week now, and haven't thought about fucking any strangers either. It's quite eerie.
Are you planning on wandering into construction sites drunk and falling down 6' holes?
probably
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Randomize
