I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
