Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
woke up with the dennys waiters MYSPACE link on the back of my receipt...yep one of those nights
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
dude, i just found out morgan freeman loves weed. all my moms arguments are now irrelevant
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
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