May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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