we're blogging at a bar
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
Last night I ate the rest of the salsa with my hands. And i DONT have a hangover? Glorious.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
