so im in the parking lot of taco bell eating a taco...and some girl just got out of a car and screamed at the top of her lungs "XANEX FOR SALE!!!!" i fucking love Hamilton.
Do u think I can claim pregnancy as an accident so my insurance covers it?
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
Remember when we used to share painkillers at parties? Now we're dealing in blood pressure pills. Oh, how the mighty have fallen.
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
Ps I'm glad our relationship hasn't progressed into having to get married so we legally can't testify against each other
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
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