she said i have a nice penis, i told her only bob saget and god could judge that.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
at what point last night did i get this tattoo of an anchor made of dicks?
around eleven
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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