You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
new low: my hungover self just mistook bacon grease for mashed potatoes. worst. mistake. ever.
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
I'll just have to do enough fangirling for the both of us. Nipples engaged.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
My feelings for him are donzo molonzo but I can't turn down a pierced penis...
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
