whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I have shit my pants twice this week. #adulthood
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
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