Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
So I've decided to grow a vagina forest. Because I'm single and it's like a zen garden. Brings a new meaning to long hair don't care.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
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