he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
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