Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
A bitchslap is in order.
Is she still on a quest to lick every stranger that enters the bar, or have the restraining orders reached critical mass?
Randomize
