Guess who is high enough to buy Jingle All The Way?
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
I'm not drinking with you for AT LEAST a day
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
I need to thank someone for this kid's penis.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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