His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.
I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Police were closing down the bar due to gunfight and I was crying because they wouldn't let me finish putting temporary shamrock tats on my boobs
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
you said, "I wonder what your mum is doing right now." in the middle of sex, of course I threw up on you.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
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