I woke up fully clothed on top of my sheets and i didnt even pee myself..so proud.
I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
Got a traffic ticket on the way home.. Literally cost me $171 to give him a blowjob. I swear the officer could smell the cum in my hair.
What's his name?? He crossfits 6 times a week, works in finance & is into the occasional felony class drug. His name is irrelevant in order to know if I wanna bone him again.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
I'm legitimately the first person in the United States to successfully shave their balls with a Razer Blade of a sword and fully admitt it. I'm honestly smoother then a 10 year old.
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