Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I don't care how many kiddie pools are in our house. One is too many.
Do not shit in our house. There is no TP. I am walking to get more, if I do not return, I have probably died of dysentery after my last wagon wheel got stuck in a gulch. Tell Martha and Lou Ann that I love them, and that I passed away doing the Lord's work.
Sorry about the flaming shit on your door
I never thought I'd be in my late 20s and send that text
my dry spell has ended & now it's like a tsunami of dick i can't handle it
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
I brought an already opened bag of trail mix from home to snack on today. Some motherfucker ate all the m&ms out of it. I hate my roommates
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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