Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
my brain is sober enough to have a conversation.. but my arms feel nice
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
She keeps stunt undies in her bag, 2 sizes too small. She leaves them behind so the guy thinks he was luckier than he was...
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
You're the only guy I know who could convince a lady at the pharmacy to trade you her pain pills for your antibiotics.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
