sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
there seems to be a considerable amount of hair missing from my left hand. i may have lit it on fire again
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
