We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
Don't worry I drank 7 more beers & brought home a guy that bit me at the bar.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I know it's early but when you wake up can you please validate my life and tell me I'm not just a drunk idiot.
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
