then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
What can I say, I just want your vagina in my mouth.
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
Randomize
