Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
I'm eating the rest of the Xmas shrooms and welcoming 2012 by communing with the pine cone.
Bright side: maybe hell start being nice to you now that you know he has erectile dysfunction.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
