Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
you said you were the change fairy and you kept throwing all of your quarters at me.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
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