Where you at
assisting at a photo shoot in williamsburg till 7ish. wassup?
Doesn't matter. I already jerked off in your bed.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Everything is bullshit and I hate everyone
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Potholders are an underrated garment. Especially naked.
Last night I realized I made a dick appt 2 MONTHS IN ADVANCE!!!!....... WHO THE HELL DOES THAT!?!? LMAO!
Randomize
