ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
When I say I took advantage of you when you were drunk, I mean that I convinced you to let me paint cute little panda bears on all of your toenails.
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
DIBS ON THE NEW GUY.
NO. NO FUCKING YOUR COWORKERS
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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